By: Emma Shandy Anway, MS, LMFT
The morning of April 12th in Davis was a joyous one as the community engaged with all things Picnic Day. As I watched the parade with my friends and family, I remember feeling so grateful to have a day to relax and play—three hours later I was sitting in my house with my kids, listening to the police helicopters overhead, fighting off my own anxiety while explaining to my kids why we could not go to the park as we planned.
Gun violence continues to be a common enough occurrence that it is important to know how to take care of yourself and the nervous system in the aftermath.
1. Give yourself Permission to feel (or not feel)
There’s no “right or wrong” thing to feel after traumatic events. Rage, grief, despair, panic, numb… all of it is valid. Make space for these feelings without judging them, then try journaling, reaching out to a friend, or just taking a few quiet moments to name what you’re feeling. That can help find calm in the midst of them.
2. Limit media consumption
It is important to stay informed, but endless access to news scrolling can overwhelm your nervous system and spike feelings of powerlessness. Give yourself permission to unplug. Find 1-2 trusted sources and set boundaries around how often you check for updates. Give your brain some breathing room.
3. Connect with others
Take time to reach out to friends and neighbors. Give yourself space to process and grieve together. Talk about your experiences with what happened, what you’re currently feeling and what may be helpful moving forward. The gentle reminder that you are not alone is incredibly grounding.
